Need Advice about wife

[mustbecrazy]

Well, I have decided to build a wood fired pizza oven, but by wife thinks not.
I have mentally run though the usual "tricks" us guys use to convince the little woman that we really-really-really need a WFO. (Oops- ladies quit reading now)

"Like surprising her with it as a present for her, I may be able to hide the WFO from her as I am going to build it at our farm, but I am currently using this one on another project."

Maybe the:"It is just for relaxation. So was the boat, which now just sits in the garage."

"It wouldn't cost anything to build, because I have everything already trick." She can see through that one the first time I stop to pick up one more sack of cement.

A strong argument would be "I'll do all the cooking in it so you won't have to cook" but I am not going to build it at home so that wouldn't work. Plus I might get tire of cooking all the time, besides that's woman's work. oops erase-erase- how to I delete- OH MAN- I'm in trouble now.. no just kidding.."All house hold chores should be equally shared and I really believe this..yes honestly I do.. I'm not kidding."



"Its for the kids" (They're adults so let them build their own)

"I'll buy you something of equal or greater value" ouch..this one can really hurt. Lets not go this direction.

"It can be for my birthday present." If I live to be 120.

Any help would be greatly appreciated as I already have all the brick, steel, gravel, and I am anxious to begin.

I gotta go she's starting to get suspicious as to what I am doing on the computer. Our secret right?
Thanks Gene

[david s]

Re: Need Advice about wife

I had to take my wife to the doctor yesterday and the doctor pulled me aside and said
" I don't like the look of her"
I replied "Neither do I but she's a great cook and she's terrific with the kids".

Gene, you could just build it and suffer the consequences. You could use

[Grimaldi]

Re: Need Advice about wife

A man has to do what a man has to do...just do it and suffer the consequences

Then tell her it could be a money making enterprise for her, she could take up the hobby of baking bread and sell it at the farmer's market...then throw out some number like if she bakes 30 loafs @ $5 a loaf she can make an extra $140 ($10 for flour) a week spending money. If that doesn't impress her, jack up the numbers accordingly Plus, she will makes lots of new friends and can catch up on all the gossip around town every week

Good Luck!

[david s]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Oops... The excuse that you were obsessed and therefore unable to control yourself. I'm sure once you build it she'll love it.
Dave

[Tscarborough]

Re: Need Advice about wife

I always use this one to good effect:

OK then, I will start hanging out in bars full of loose women since I have nothing else to do.

[Ken524]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Show her some of the ovens on this site and let her see what we do with our ovens... These things aren't one-trick-ponies. You are welcome to show her my pizza-oven page; I describe how we decided it was worth the effort and time.
Hokester's Wood Fired Pizza Oven

[mustbecrazy]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Grimaldi, I like your suggestion. I actually considered building an oven on a trailer to take to a new farmers market, I spent a couple of days daydreaming about all the money we could make selling pizzas, and all the fun it would be... somehow the idea couldn't get any traction with anyone: Son, Daughter,Wife, grandson. What, is everybody lazy these days? Just do it.(and then suffer the consequences) I like that, here in Eugene we are in Nike country and I have used that "Just Do It" several times. The last time was when I bought a farm and didn't tell my wife until on the way to closing. I'm still sorta suffering the consequences. "Just Do It" is my usual technique, I was hoping to be a little more sophisticated this time.

Tscarborough, that idea sounds real complicated. It's been 42 years since I have been in the dating scene. And then I wasn't allowed in bars. (Too Young) Where does one find bars full of loose women? Whats a good pick-up line? Hi-my name is Gene..I have a woodfired oven hot right now over at my place and would you like to come on over and watch me make pizza? ... Actually that's not bad.

Ken, great pizza oven page.You built one beautiful oven, great job. I bookmarked it, I'll use it later on my "campaign" to win her over. You mentioned some a magic word on your website that I haven't thought about "Italian" oven. She loves Italian food. (I don't really like Italian food except pizza)
I don't want to screw up this so I am going to plan my "campaign" carefully with an answer to every objection. Maybe get some "How to Sell Anything" motivation tapes.
Ken, your spread sheet is great. I actually have everything that you have on your list except mortar cement, Portland cement and insulation.I'm an avid collector of junk.

David, I have used that excuse to good effect several times but needs to be played very carefully or it can back fire. If I did the cooking she would love it so that has potential.

This forum is fantastic, thanks everyone for the advice. Wow.. lots of advice and I haven't even started building yet. Thanks Gene

[jverity]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Gene- I empathize wholeheartedly. I jump from one obsession to another with zeal and enthusiasm, much to my husband's bewildered amusement.

One good point for your wife; cooking from scratch with whole ingredients- organic even, if that makes her day. I am from Washington and us northwestern women get all giddy over whole foods. Traditional Italian whole foods. Oh my!

While I often employ this premise; "it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission", I admire your desire to do things right this time.

This is what would work for me; Say that you have all these wonderful reasons gathered up (incredible food, potential money earnings, rosemary focaccia dipped in olive oil, blah, blah), then dismiss them all. Say that the reasons are not all that important. The truth is that you have another obsession that you want to pursue, but this time instead of going about it behind her back, you want to be more mature. You want her support. You need her as your wife and partner. To her it may seem just another silly obsession that will end up collecting dust, but this is who you are and how you approach life, with passion and zeal for new ideas. You want to include her in that.

See if that works! Good luck!

(Me, I'm taking the surprise him with it for our anniversary approach!)

[mustbecrazy]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Jverity, Thank you, great advice. Obsession is a good word. Without getting into too deep of a discussion about marriage etc, my question would be what if she says no- Not interested? I think I would need to build my case a little bit more before I spring the trap so to speak. But great advice: "I need her as wife and partner."

Meanwhile, I am doing some research, a bit of planning, making some decisions and this forum is fantastic for that.

India...is that a lot like Washington? Just kidding. Thanks Gene

[Ken524]

Re: Need Advice about wife

I haven't thought about "Italian" oven.

Yep... I think "Italian wood-fired brick oven" is a far more accurate description of what we are building. It can cook anything, including pizza.

It's a multi-tasker... Very important when trying to justify the time and cost of the project

If it helps, any concerns my family and extended family had about my project evaporated immediately after our first pizza party.

[kebwi]

Re: Need Advice about wife

My wife was thrilled about having less yard to mow. You could bring that up. She would have me convert the back-yard into a tennis court if I offered.

[mustbecrazy]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Ken, I got it now. "Italian Wood Fired Oven" used to cook Italian Food. And of coarse I would have to cook the "Italian Food" because of the fire and everything. That has great possibilities. I still think I may need to keep it secret until it is done. Then surprise her at a big pizza...nope "Italian Food" party, with lots a people there so she could be too mad.

Kebwi, your wife mows the grass? or was she thrilled about YOU having less grass to mow? Good idea but I would be building my "Italian Wood Fired Oven" at our farm not at home.

[kebwi]

Re: Need Advice about wife

I have a strict no mowing policy. I do lots of other yard work, but I don't mow.

[mustbecrazy]

Re: Need Advice about wife

Keith, is that a garden like basil or something on top of your "Italian Wood Fired Oven"?
How ingenious. It looks like it grows pretty good. Hummm I wonder how far a person could take that idea. No questions I bet about how fresh the basil is. Is that a real pizza or is it just photo shopped to look that good?

Hey, I just thought of something: an "Italian Wood Fired Oven" would be considered carbon neutral wouldn't it. Not like those people who want to destroy our planet using gas or electricity to cook their pizza. Which brings up the question of when will the "Government" require people to use "Wood Fired" ovens if they want to eat cooked food. Would we have food lines at our "Wood Fired" ovens of neighbors wanting to cook their meals? Actually that may happen anyway from what I hear.

All in fun. Gene

[kebwi]

Re: Need Advice about wife

EVERYone suggests growing herbs on top of the oven. Nope. It's just mixed ground covers. I wanted something low maintenance that would look good all the time, not annuals that die and look like crap and have to replanted all the time.